Paulina Porizkova has marked her 56th birthday by reflecting on this previous 12 months, saying it was ‘unquestionably the worst’ time in her life, however her darkest days have given her what she ‘wanted.’
The supermodel took to Instagram on Friday to publish a black and white portrait of herself posed together with her sons Jonathan, 27, and Oliver, which was lately taken by Alexi Lubomirski, Prince Harry and Meghan Markle‘s marriage ceremony photographer.
‘My fifty fifth 12 months was unquestionably the worst 12 months of my life. I misplaced and needed to let go of every thing I had been constructing my entire life,’ she candidly wrote within the caption.
Trying again: Paulina Porizkova marked her 56th birthday on Friday be reflecting on her previous 12 months, saying it was the ‘worst’ time in her life
Arduous: The previous 12 months and a half has been extremely tough for Paulina, who misplaced her estranged husband Ric Ocasek in September 2019. She lately shared this photograph of herself crying
‘The low level was flying seven hours to a paradise vacation spot with my boys to recoup my sanity, and getting despatched proper again as a result of I forgot to examine the expiration of my passport.’
Paulina had beforehand opened up in regards to the second in November, saying she had a ‘nervous breakdown’ in an airport in Costa Rica after she realized her passport was expired.
‘I, somebody happy with by no means crying, was sitting within the San Jose airport crying so onerous they needed to put me in a wheelchair to roll me again on the aircraft. With a blanket over my head,’ she recalled in her newest publish.
The previous 12 months and a half has been extremely tough for Paulina, who misplaced her estranged husband Ric Ocasek in September 2019.
Robust: Paulina (pictured with Ric in 2013) struggled with melancholy and rage after studying he had lower her out of his will, leaving her with none cash, together with her personal earnings
Transferring on: Paulina offered the townhouse the place she lived together with her late husband for 3 many years for $10 million in September
New life: The Sports activities Illustrated star now lives in a rental residence in Manhattan
Whereas mourning The Automobiles frontman, she struggled with melancholy, nervousness, and rage after studying he had lower her out of his will — leaving her with none cash, together with her personal earnings as a mannequin.
Paulina lately revealed that she was so strapped for money following the rocker’s loss of life that her pals had to purchase her meals to stay off of.
This previous September, she offered the New York Metropolis townhouse the place she and Ric had lived for greater than 30 years for $10 million. She nonetheless has her dwelling in upstate New York and now lives in a rental residence in Manhattan.
‘As we speak I’m turning 56. I am lastly beginning to get a hold of who I’m,’ she famous in her birthday publish. ‘I’m lastly getting extra comfy in my admittedly looser pores and skin. My life is taking up a brand new form. It’s not one I needed, however I suppose I’m getting simply what I wanted. (Pun absolutely supposed).
‘And though I don’t consider that hardships make you stronger, they do remind you of how sturdy you’re. They usually develop your world of empathy and understanding. They usually remind you of how vital love is,’ she continued.
Reflection: Paulina (pictured with Ric and their two sons in 2016) mentioned she is lastly adjusting to her new life, saying: ‘It’s not one I needed, however I suppose I’m getting simply what I wanted’
‘When all has gone to s**t — solely love counts. The love of my pals, of my household, of my boys who unhesitatingly escorted me the place I wanted to go, and solely mentioned, “Mother, no matter you want.”‘
Paulina ended her publish by thanking her 349,000 Instagram followers — a mixture of followers and pals — for his or her ‘assist’ and ‘encouragement’ this previous 12 months.
‘Maybe you DO have an concept of how a lot I leaned on you all within the darkest days,’ she added, ‘however when you didn’t — you do now.’
The week earlier than her birthday, Paulina appeared on the Tamron Corridor Present to talk in regards to the bitter backlash she confronted for posting an at-home lingerie shoot on Instagram, for which critics known as her ‘determined’ and ‘sick.’
When Tamron, 50, requested her to weigh-in on why ladies ‘celebrating our ageing on this empowering means rubs a nerve with some individuals,’ she famous that she was ‘celebrated for displaying up in lingerie’ when she was in her 20s.
Opening up: The week earlier than her birthday, Paulina appeared on the Tamron Corridor Present to talk about the bitter backlash she confronted for posting an at-home lingerie shoot
Double normal: ‘In my 20s, I used to be celebrated for displaying up in lingerie,’ she identified, saying she now faces criticism for embracing her sexuality
Underneath hearth: The mannequin posed for a shocking shoot in her New York Metropolis residence final month, however she was known as ‘determined’ and ‘sick’ after she posted them on Instagram
‘I used to be getting fairly some huge cash for it, and all people liked me,’ she recalled.
That waterfall of reward rapidly dried up as quickly as Paulina reached her 40s, nonetheless, and he or she started going through criticism at any time when she tried to embrace her sexuality.
‘I nonetheless assume I look fairly good in lingerie [in my 50s], however the response is reviled. Clearly not by all people, however there’s a honest quantity of backlash about [it],’ she mentioned.
‘I feel it is as a result of, if you become old, there is a sure kind of invisible boundary that occurs perhaps in your mid-40s, the place you, I suppose, do not look fertile anymore? It is [maybe] a menopausal kind of factor.
‘And perhaps it is since you’re beginning to appear to be somebody’s mother that attractive is not allowed. You are allowed to be lovely, you are allowed to be good-looking, you are allowed to be current, you are allowed to be even stunning or eye-opening, however you aren’t allowed to be attractive.’